some of the topics

i had a great time the other night with dr.s and r.mini with involving discussions about love, life, sexuality and everything else, which got
me thinking..

it seemed odd to them the way that (pardon the generalization) gay 
men have a lot less issues with poligamy than heretosexuals. the only
thing that they do seem to have in common is that both parties are 
always in the loop. if you want to have a bit of a fool around with the 
guy at reception, feel free, but let's discuss it first.

with hetro's it's more a case of, if you want to, then you don't love me..

i find that women (generalization) have an inextricable bond with love
 and sex, whereas men can quite easily seperate the two.

i find it also quite fated that some people are doomed to a bizarre life
where they are sexually attracted to one sex, but attracted in all
other ways to another..

woman trapped in a man's body? unlikely..

can you live with someone you love completely and never be sexually
fulfilled? how about having all the sex, but really not being able to
stand the person you're having the sex with?

these were just some of the topics..

What’s right in your life?

There are two kinds of people in the world (gross generalization I know, but give me some leeway and just see where this goes!
–    those who look at what’s right in their lives,
–    and those who look at what’s wrong in their lives.

Quantum physics teaches us that nature/ life continually strives to be in balance. So nice things will happen to you, dreadful things will happen to you. Sometimes you’ll win and sometimes you’ll lose. That’s life.

The thing that makes the difference between being unhappy or sad is where our focus lies. If your focus is on what’s wrong, you will only notice and register the things that are wrong; you will spend your time thinking about how bad life is, and so it will be.

If your focus is on what’s right, you will notice the good things and the things that bring you pleasure. You will register what’s working in your life, and your world will feel good and right, and so it will be.

If you are wondering why on earth you married your spouse, or why you are working where you are, try changing your focus onto what is right. Spend one month looking for what’s right. Start by writing down one thing that’s right in your situation. Next day look for two things, next day three etc. Do this for a whole month and see where it takes you.

Remember every situation/ person has “good” and “bad” characteristics – choose your focus and raise your awareness of how your feelings of well-being are affected by your focus.  There will still be good and bad – that’s how life is. You have a choice, however, about how you would like to feel about life.

I am not saying that you must wear rose-tinted spectacles. It is useful every now and again to look at what’s wrong in your life. You must then decide what you can do differently to change this. If it’s someone else’s fault and you are not prepared to change anything yourself – then you are living in ‘victim’ mode and you will remain unhappy. Your power lies within yourself – you can change your thoughts, your actions and your attitude.

Yes, look at what’s wrong and then take action to change it. BUT continually focus on what is right and what’s working and you will find yourself in a more resourceful emotional state! You’ll simply be happier!


“A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is one who hopes they are.”

“It's better to be an optimist who is sometimes wrong than a pessimist who is always right”

training day

just spent a wonderful late morning doing so gym & jogging. i asked dr. S to join me.

we got off to a rocky start, as we planned to meet at a jang-out called the 'danish', but when i got there.. nothing!

so after jogging up the mountain to the danish, waiting there for about 20min's,  i decided to take a jog to his place. got there.. nothing..

so i ran back to the danish, taking an alternative route, in case i missed him. got there.. nothing.. (notice a trend?)

i didn't have my cellphone on me (no point in getting it sweaty right?) and it's 31 Celsius out. (about 88 F) so by this time i decide to call it quits. 

i'm on my way back down the mountain on the other side  when i bump into dr. S, and finally our training regime starts.. with a jog back to the danish and from there to the park for some training.

all in all the day went quite differently than planned, but was nontheless very productive!!!

sometimes things work out for the better, even if they don't quite happen as you planned them

(well, probably because they didn't happen as you planned them!)

good times

 

what a safari

went to an "auction farm for singles" yesterday. a mundane safari of pathos and desperation. a place so obscene it makes a downtown crack house look like the chicago sound-bar.

here we have a thousand or so odd people (and i do mean odd) lichored-up on copious amounts of local brew, listening techno renditions of local folk music, sung in native tongue (not english).

men acting out their boisterous alpha-male selves, ego's the size of the monumental chapel, also on the grounds (why? a nightclub with a chapel?!). women, easier than fishing in a barrel with a sawn-off browning, makes a town-central prostitute look like audrey hepburn. altogether a very sad sight.

and here's the crazy thing..

everybody loves this place. come 10pm, this place is packed. why? can anybody really be that desperate? i was there with a bunch of friends. we came in and bought a round of beers. and we couldn't down them fast enough to get out of there. i never finished mine, was just so relieved we left.

may i never set foot in a place even remotely similar..

tailormade audi

some of the images from the tailormade audi drawing boards..

gun control

we live in violent times.
sometimes a joke is all that keeps us sane.

another one for the boys

i just got the news today that a friend of mine (a very prude friend - no disrespect intended) is batting for the home team. which, albeit it be a good sign of patriotism really caught me off-side.

it's like the opel ad on t.v. - it's not that i didn't expect it, but just that i didn't expect it so soon.

i mean i knew long ago already, but i don't think he did. i'm glad to hear that the stigma is slowly disappearing in certain circles, at least. in my country it is completely legal to marry same-sex partners, and the legislation is being changed, as i write this, to have the definition of marriage changed to a bond between two individuals doing away with the old "bond between a man and a woman" description.

the act is due to be passed on the 1st of dec 2006.

the world is changing.. and i like it!

i want to be pure

i was going through my bookshelf when i came across a book called: "students' dormitories and homes for the aged" by max fengler. published in 1964 this book does show it's age, but it also shows the great architecture, a simplistic approach to pure functionalist design.

one word describes this book

pure

i would like to have the same approach to my design, the same simplicity in my life. i am the architect of my destiny.. in more ways than one.

i hoped that i could just look for those principles that those heroic architects used, those spaces seem so complete, but then i realized that those spaces don't work now, here, in my time.

times have changed.

people aren't as quiet.

life's pace has picked up, people talk, no topic is taboo. i was watching television the other day when a couple of young adults (they where all about 13 years old, but i call them adults, by the topics they discuss and the activities in which they indulge..) where talking about oral sex like it was a valentines' day card to be given out to anyone willing to accept it. young adult girls are having anal sex to preserve their virginity?

things have changed, values have changed. it seems strange that a thing like virginity would still matter, if you're having anal sex..

and everyone is talking about it, like they're talking about the weekend's football game. except they're not talking about the game, they are discussing the situation in iraq, foreign policy, the WTO.

at least that was weeks topic, this too is now passe. people talk about everything.. they just aren't as quiet.

and then.. sometimes, when i think that no topic is taboo..


i can recall, not so long ago when i very excitedly phoned up a friend of mine and before greeting him, started telling this great joke i heard. the conversation went someting like this:

me: "..no, the grandad was dead! what? what he supposed to live forver! ha! ha! haaa!"

him:"...(cough)..."

me: "are you okay? wasn't that funny? what happened?"

him:"my grandad died earlier today.."

me: "what? are you sure? are you okay? i'm sorry."

i mean really! of all the jokes i could have told, of all the things i could have said. i couldn't have known. i still feel bad about it.

i have learnt, silence is a virtue, nothing is pure, and..

life is messy

saved by dis-ease

moral highground might be my downfall

i am just about to hand in my final year projects to finish my degree. this degree has been such a struggle to complete. it feels like i've been destined not to complete, but luckily for me, i fell deadly ill the day before my hand-in.

consequently, i had to go to the doctor and got a sick-letter, which allows me another week or so to work on my project.

this project is giving me so much grief.. let me explain..

for a long time now, i've been struggling with this project, because it is a project on retail.. which to me is a folly. retail represents to me the growing need for personal acquisition and  appropriation. our very selfish  need. find that very wrong. i am a communist in theory, or rather, i believe in:

a communist social structure, with a democratic political structure and a capitalist financial structure

the need for more systems to facilitate capitalist habits, in our time, in the society we live in with so many pertinent issues facing us today; that somehow just seems very ignorant to me.

we are going through a time of change. western habits are destroying the world we live in. green house gasses (>70% of which comes from 1st world countries) are destroying the ecosystems of 3rd world countries, which coincidentally are more ill equipped to deal with it them. the raging drought in central africa which has lasted more than 40years and has killed more people than WW1 and WW2 together, is said to be caused by the by the summer monsoon belt not moving down south enough, caused by the elevated air temp. over the northern hemisphere. This means that since the 1960's these people haven't seen any real rain. this is a direct cause of global warming.

this is just one issue of many, caused by capitalism..

now don't get me wrong, i don't live in a hut, surviving off sustainance farming, but i do believe that we should, if nothing else, strive for a more sustainable way of life.

so...

when i got the news that i was supposed to design a retail store, i felt very strongly about not doing it. i decided to, in stead, try and do a social and moral up-liftment center within the existing retail envelope in a manner which makes it economically sustainable, whilst contributing to society in a positive and responsible  manner..

this is a bit more of a challenge, than i initially anticipated..

but, like i said earlier, luckily i fell ill, and thus have a couple more days to work on it

in the beginning

i'm coming to a crossroad. i think it's time to take stock..

where to start? I'll start with a poem i wrote many years ago. it is very bad, by my own recognition, but it sets the tone:

The rose,
I feel,
I see,
I know but little
about my little rose.

Yet I know enough
to love...
to need...
my little rose.

My little rose is young and sweet,
my little rose is live of beat.

And sometimes my little rose gets angry...
and silent in whole,
But to her belongs my heart...
to her I'll give my soul.

I love my little rose.